I've been talking with a good friend lately about how I am different since I lost my grandmother a few weeks ago...and how hard it is to yield back into the lifestream, as if nothing ever happened, when something did happen. She has suffered a tremendous loss recently as well. We have pretty much agreed that it's ok not to be the same; or to pretend you are. It's ok to be changed outwardly, when you so are inwardly.
Today I was thinking back over just the last few months (the whole year would simply be too much for one sitting).....thinking about how many new and deep scars I have suffered. Life is so peculiar. Just when you finally think you've come to grips with certain things.....moved through them......healed a little.......here comes a new, bigger, different battle.
So, in a matter of days - not years, not decades, just days - I've lost three very important people to me. Two crones and mentors....one friend my own age......